Lessons Learned

Here I am, the day after Black Friday, thinking back to two years ago when I had begun my year-long break up with shopping.  That means it was only one year ago that I reunited with shopping.  I remember it vividly.  It was on that day one year ago that I wrote this email to Caitlin, the one who inspired me to take on the challenge.  So what has it been like, allowing myself to freely venture into stores and spend money on clothes, shoes and accessories again?  As I've shared here before, there were many lessons I learned during my year of no shopping.  Here are just a few of them that come to my mind today.

Lesson #1: Less is more.

One of the reasons why I felt so discontent with my closet was because I had so many ill-fitting, poor quality pieces in my closet.  I didn't want to get rid of them, but at the same time, I never wanted to wear them.  I purged my closet and kept the pieces that fit well and were made well.  I still clean out my closet at times to make sure I'm not holding on to things I don't wear.  A good rule I try to follow is to donate one piece for every new piece.

Lesson #2:  Choose quality over quantity.

During my year of no shopping, I actually did some shopping with gift cards/gift money from special occasions, but because I was limited, I became picky.  No more impulse buying.  Pre-break-up I would just grab a bunch of stuff and not try them on.  The result was a closet full of clothing I never wore.  In order to find pieces that fit me well, I started to shop in the women's petites section instead of the junior's department.  If I'm looking for a well-made timeless piece, I look for quality brands, even if it means spending a little more.

Lesson #3:  Lifestyle defines personal style.  

Pinterest is great for finding style inspiration, however, one day in the middle of winter, I recreated an outfit I had pinned, but soon realized that I was freezing cold. Also, my outfit was made of pieces that were not conducive to my duties as a momma of two little ones.  Another time I recreated a work outfit I had seen, but when I got to my classroom, my shoes hurt my feet and I felt hindered and unproductive the whole day.  It was then that I started deliberately thinking about my personal style.   One word came to my mind: comfy.  At the same time, I didn't want to sacrifice style for comfort.  I became @howcomfy on Instagram and I started the hashtag #comfymommastyle and #comfyteacherstyle to document the outfits that worked for me.  I've met several sweet moms and teachers who really encourage me in my style endeavors.    

Lesson #4: Look for remixable pieces.

This is the fun part.  Instead of buying outfits that could only be worn one way or for one occasion, I purchased pieces that I could mix and match.  Style bloggers like Audrey from Putting Me Together and Caitlin from Greater Than Rubies, have taught me a lot in this area.  I started buying pieces that I could wear for different occasions.  I've also participated in Caitlin's remix challenges where you choose twenty pieces to remix exclusively for thirty days.  I've learned how to shop my closet, and it has helped me to be a better steward of what I own and to be content with what God has given me. 

Lesson #5: Trust God.  

I am amazed at how much God has blessed me through this entire "style journey."  Never in my life have I felt so content and provided for.  There have been times throughout these past two years when someone would just give me clothes or I'd get a gift card from a student.  Another cool thing that has happened during my style journey has been the clearance sales at the Plato's Closet and Clothes Mentor stores here.  Because they are consignment stores, I have been able to purchase name brand pieces (some still with tags) for only $1!  I'm not necessarily saying "trust God and He'll give you clothes" although He does say in Matthew chapter 6: "Now if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is, and tomorrow thrown into the oven, will He not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?  Therefore do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or "What shall we wear?'...For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things.  But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you."  What I'm saying is when you trust God with every aspect of your life, He is always faithful.

Sometimes I get really self-conscious about my participation on social networks with regards to "style."  I worry about people judging the things I post and write, thus allowing the enemy to rob me of any kind of joy or peace.  At the same time, I've learned so many things that have strengthened my relationship with God and has helped me minister to others. 

As this holiday season marks another year of my style revelation, I've been reflecting on some of my experiences, and I know that God can use our experiences to point us to Him.  I'm trusting Him to use me in whatever way He wants to use me.  Starting today, I want to share more of my experiences through this blog.  I hope you'll stick around and join me once in awhile.    

P.S.  Linking up with The Modern Austen for Sunday Best!

Summer Remix Challenge Week 3

Week 3 of the summer remix challenge proved to be a challenge indeed.  I fell behind on my blogging schedule because of some unexpected circumstances, but they were good surprises that helped me to remember why I started this blog in the first place. 

Last Monday, Mr. How whisked us away to Oklahoma City for a spontaneous road trip to celebrate our ten year anniversary. (Here in "Blogland" I will refer to my husband as Mr. How because I called him that for four years before we were married. You see, we met while teaching at the same school; he taught second grade and I taught third grade.  My reference to him as Mr. How is an affectionate one.)

Why OKC you ask?  Our good friend, J.T., who performed our wedding ceremony now lives there, so we were able to spend some time with him and his wife.  On the morning of our anniversary we went to a little park near our hotel and J.T. performed an intimate (read: just us) ceremony and we renewed our wedding vows.  It was a gorgeous day - 80 degrees in the middle of July is unheard of!

You can probably tell from the photo above that I was in tears, as J.T. gave us the chance to remember our wedding day and reflect on the things that God has taught us over the past ten years.  Since then we have moved from the West Coast to the South, changed careers, and purchased our dream home.  Our biggest and most significant change has of course been the addition of two children to our little How family.  As we renewed our wedding vows, we also had the opportunity to tell each other what we have learned to appreciate about the other.  One thing I appreciate about Mr. How is that he provides for our children and me.  Even though I work and my paycheck contributes to our family finances, I still submit to him as the head of our household.  We make many of our decisions together, however, he ultimately carries our burdens, and I'm thankful for the wisdom he uses to decide what is best for our family.  Because of this, I want to be a woman/wife/mother who uses wisdom, too.  I need to use my time wisely and also spend wisely.  

When I started this blog I wasn't exactly sure what I would write about.  I knew I wanted to document my "style journey" and I never thought I'd learn so much along the way.  For example, this summer remix challenge is teaching me, in more ways than one, to trust Him and to be content. It's also helped me to live a simpler life and to be a better steward of what I own.  I've also met some really neat women/wives/mothers who have similar situations (read: struggles) as I do and we've been able to encourage each other and provide accountability. 

I did not take outfit photos during the 3 days we were out of town.  Two of those days were spent traveling so I wore other pieces, although I did pack several of my summer remix challenge pieces.  (I'll try to do another post about travel outfits and packing another time.)

I wore this first outfit on our actual anniversary which was on Tuesday.  I've had this dress since our first anniversary.  It's one of my favorites because it's a simple design and I love all the colors in it.  I've been able to wear it with several different colored completer pieces for several different occasions.  I paired it with my denim jacket because it was cooler that day and it was what I had packed.  It dawned on me that a white denim jacket would have been appropriate for a wedding vow renewal and would also make a good addition to my closet.

Outfit 1: denim jacket + printed dress + neutral sandals

Occasion:  wedding anniversary vow renewal and sightseeing with family

I don't know about y'all but it was kinda overcast and rainy in our neck of the woods this week.  On Thursday I was happy to have this 3/4 sleeve tshirt in my remix. I paired it with white capris and yellow flats to keep myself cheerful on such a gloomy day.

Outfit 2: white capris + striped tee + yellow flats

Occasion: chores then Bunko ladies night

Again, it was kinda chilly most of the week so my trusty denim jacket made its appearance in several of my outfits. 

Outfit 3: denim jacket + coral cords + polka dot tank top + leopard slides

Occasion:  day with the family then evening with visiting relatives

Easy peasy comfy momma style right here.

Outfit 4:  denim jacket + tshirt dress + neutral sandals

Occasion:  sightseeing downtown with relatives including the splash pad for the kids

This was the first time I wore this maxi dress.  I picked it up at the Loft Outlet on our road trip to San Antonio.  It was an extra small petite and fit me perfectly so I snatched it up.  I'm looking forward to remixing it for other occasions. 

Outfit 5:  denim jacket + maxi dress + sandals

Occasion:  church

Because I did choose a lot of neutral pieces for my remix I knew I was going to have to incorporate accessories for color.  I've been adding more colored shoes to my wardrobe and thought red would go well with this black and white outfit. 

Outfit 6:  black shorts + polka dot tank top + red flats

Occasion:  hanging out with family

Again, it took me a few days to get this post out because more unexpected things happened this week.  And again, it was all good, so I'll share more next time!  Have a great rest of the week!

Linking up with The Pleated Poppy and Tucker Up for What I Wore Wednesday!

A Clothing Fast Revelation

When I decided to start this blog (a week ago), I wanted to be able to share not only the things I've learned towards my "quest for comfort," but also the things I've learned about being a good steward.  I mentioned in this post that when I finally discovered style blogs, I also decided to take a break from clothes shopping for an.entire.year.  Since there's just so much I can say about that year of no shopping, I will probably go more in depth in future posts.  Today I'm literally going to cut and paste a summary of what I wrote to Caitlin about my clothing fast experience.

Caitlin is Caitlin Skidmore who writes over at Greater Than Rubies. To make a long story short, I basically found her blog via Pinterest.  When I discovered her jewel of a blog on Black Friday of 2012, Caitlin was near the end of her own break-up with shopping.  She had started her clothing fast in January of that year and had documented many of her outfits on her blog.  As I read post after post about her experiences over the year, it suddenly dawned on me, "This is what I need to do."  I was inspired.  A whole year of not shopping for clothes?!  Impossible!  Or was it?

I emailed Caitlin and shared with her my decision to go on a clothing fast.  We kept in touch and she was (and still is!) an encouragement to me in so many ways.  One day she asked me if I would write a guest post for her blog and share some of the things I had been sharing with her.  I was humbled to have been asked and I didn't feel confident about writing a piece about my experience, but with God's help, I went ahead and wrote some things that I had learned over the past year.  I felt like God would want me to share my story of His grace and faithfulness to encourage others who may have been experiencing similar things as I had been experiencing. 

You can read the original post from Cailtin's blog here.  Here's my clothing fast revelation:

There’s so much more to my story but basically one year ago I had been feeling discontent with several areas of my life. As a wife and working mother of two little ones I was feeling overwhelmed and stressed out with the busyness of trying to balance my marriage relationship with my husband, caring for my then 4 year old son and 18 month old daughter, and teaching English to 5th-8th grade middle schoolers. Add housekeeping, ministry at church, and other family/social obligations and you can imagine how busy and tired I was (am!) I know many of you reading this can relate!
I had been searching for ways to simplify my life for several years and I realized that one of the areas of my life that needed to be simplified was my wardrobe. I was so discouraged waking up every morning with “nothing to wear.” Or needing to have outfits that could be functional yet stylish for the different hats I wear throughout the day.

So while perusing Christian style blogs I stumbled upon Caitlin’s blog. It was Black Friday (God has a sense of humor) and realized that I needed to fast from buying clothes. The reason why I was so discontent with my closet was because I had a closet full of clothes that were ill-fitting and poor quality. Many of the pieces in my closet were impulse buys. I told myself I would learn to be content and be a good steward of what God had already blessed me with.

At first I thought I needed to hoard clothes. “How would I be able to survive without buying anything new!?” was one of my thoughts. I began scouring Pinterest for outfit ideas to remix my closet like Caitlin and so many other style bloggers do. After more “research” I realized that the reason I was so discontent was because I had too much!

Over the past year I have learned to purge my closet, redefine my style, shop wisely for quality timeless pieces with a few inexpensive refreshers to keep up with the current trends, and then remix, remix, remix!

Today I am so content with my wardrobe. Sure, over the course of the year I was still shopping, but with gift money and gift cards from special occasions. And even then I would look for remixable or classic or functional pieces. I was also given hand-me-downs from family and friends, several who didn’t even know I was fasting from shopping.

I know that there’s more to life than clothes, but it is amazing how a comfortable, well-fitting, and yet stylish outfit can change the way you go about your day. I’ve included a before and after picture that kind of sums up what I’m talking about. Both are outfits with jeans, sweatshirts, and comfortable shoes, however the second one (which actually cost less than the first one) makes me just want to get on my feet, be-bop around the house, and get chores done. It’s also functional enough for running around with my kids, and still stylish enough to go out in public and look cute for my husband.

There’s so much more I can say about what I’ve learned over the year but then this post would go on and on. I guess one of the main things I’ve learned (or realized again) is that God is faithful. By trusting Him with this area of my life I’ve been able to witness His faithfulness and His goodness in so many other ways, too. By learning to be content I have discovered more of His purpose and will for my life, which is ultimately to glorify Him with every area of my life.

I share this post because my purpose here is not to compete with or try to be like the gazillion style blogs that are out there.  During that year of not spending money on clothes, God revealed so many things about life to me, and I realize I need to share these things to hopefully inspire others in the same way I have been inspired.  We all need encouragement and I hope and pray my little blog will do just that...encourage you!

Pilot Post

Hi, I'm Iris and welcome to my blog!  I decided to start this blog as a place to document as many of the countless blessings God has given me as I can.  I titled this blog "How Comfy" because well, my last name is "How" and I love everything comfy/comfortable (I mean, who doesn't?)  I hope to write about some of my favorite comfy things like clothing, good books, food, as well as things that bring a smile to my face: my family, my friends, my home, my students. In doing so, I hope to inspire you and also keep myself inspired to experience the abundant life He has for us!